We talked about parenting in class last week. There are many purposes of parenting. The whole purpose of coming to Earth is to have families. It is a microcosm of eternal life. It is practice for Godhood. Parenting is for the parent. Heavenly Father is hurt when we are bad parents. It causes Him pain when children are not taken of properly. He loves each of them and has trusted us to care for them properly. It is an opportunity for constant, intimate teaching and learning. The purpose of parenting is to protect and help our children to learn to thrive. We should unconditionally and continually love our children no matter what. I found it very comforting to know that if parents keep their sealing covenants and their children go astray, they will be saved in this life or the next. It is very important for child and parent both to be well bonded to one another. What happens to our children should be deeply concerning to us. We need to choose to attach to the people we care about. We should want to be parents because it is associated with happiness. We learned a little bit about discipline. The word discipline comes from disciple. A disciple follows and has direction given to them. I thought that was really interesting.

This week in class we talked about work. Working together as a family builds unity. It helps you learn how to communicate with one another better. When you are doing work together where not a lot of through is required, you are more likely to talk about your thoughts and feelings. It was interesting to me to be taught that men learn best and talk more shoulder to shoulder not face to face. Men connect better when they are working together. They feel close and united when they accomplish something together. I thought it was also interesting to learn about the history of work. Everyone always talks about how people had more kids in the past because it was essentially free labor. In class we talked about how this was not true. Kids cost more than they helped. I love the idea of loving work. When we don't think of it as a chore, it becomes fun. We should think of it as a time to build unity with our family. We talked about how families go camping together and go to ranches together because they want to play work. Families don't get to do that in their day to day lives anymore.
Another thing we talked about in class was family finances. It is important that the family decides together where the money will go. You should make long term goals together with your spouse. When money is shared between spouses it communicates love, trust and commitment. Sticking to a budget is important because it helps you develop self control. It keeps you from self gratifying. Family unity comes from saving together for a common, jointly approved purpose.

I really liked reading: "Counseling with Our Councils" by Elder M Russell Ballard last week in class. When you are trying to make a decision, if everyone does not agree with the decision to be acted upon, do not go through with it even if the majority agrees. That person will feel left out of the group if his/her opinion is not taken into consideration. It is important to give everyone the opportunity to voice their opinions. Everyone's opinion is important. It is about validating everyone. It shows them that they are worth listening to. it also shows that others care. It is important to discuss to consensus regarding God's will, not any one person's.

This week in class, we talked about the impact of stresses on the family. We learned about the ABCX model. This stands for the Actual event, Behavioral response, Cognition and total eXperience. Our cognition of the experience is our thoughts about all parts of the experience. We learned that some crisis are preparatory to others. I think this is very true. There are stresses that every family goes through and these help them prepare for unexpected events. Heavenly Father gives us stress in our family life to help us grow together. We can choose to look for what we ares supposed to learn or concentrate on the pain. Trials can destroy us or make us better. It is really bad to get stuck in a state of helplessness. The victim mentality is bad. We need to do something. We should ask for Heavenly Father's help to know what it is that we need to do. We also learned about how anger is usually covering another stronger, more prevalent emotion. Anger is easier to deal with than fear and anxiety. It is an attempt on our part to regulate unpleasant emotions.

Last week in class we talked about sex and how to teach our children about this topic. I found it really interesting to learn about the different affair types. I did not realize that there was so many. I can see how it would be easy to be emotionally unfaithful without even realizing it. I did not realize how drastically my friendships with members of the opposite sex would have to change after marriage. We learned that it is difficult for women to be physically intimate until they feel safe. But men feel safe after being physically intimate. There can be a lot of problems in a marriage unless these differences are communicated. It is important to understand that sex is personal, emotional and physical. 

Last week in class we talked about the different stages couples go through together. I think it's very important that your wedding does not become more important than your marriage. The engagement period should not be a period where the only thing discussed is the wedding. The couple should plan for their marriage also. It is important to talk about how you will parent your children before they are born. It is important to give husbands' the opportunity to bond with their child. He does not need to do everything the way that you do it. Women need to take their opinions into consideration.
I thought it was interesting to learn about cohabiting. When couples live together, they tend to live parallel lives and not intertwined lives. It is a lot more difficult to go from this kind of a relationship to an intertwined one.
I think asking guests to contribute to the wedding instead of buying gifts is a great idea. This way they can feel that they are somehow contributing to the expenses of the wedding. It is also good because the couple can start their lives without worrying about money.
We talked how we should be at least as concerned about our spouse as much as we are with ourselves. This is not something that is natural. It is divine and for that reason requires heavenly help.

On Monday, in class, we talked about the definition of a date. A date should be paired off, planned for and paid for. After we had defined a date we talked about the father's role in the family. His role is to provide, protect and preside. There is a correlation between these two ideas. Men should take each of the responsibilities on a date upon themselves. Being paired off correlated with protecting. For however long the date lasts, the man is to protect the woman from any harm. Having a planned date is connected to the man presiding in the family. He is to take responsibility for directing the family. The man should also make sure that the date is paid for, which corresponds to providing. In a family setting, it is the father's role to make sure that the financial burden is not upon the woman. Just like that, it is the man's responsibility to provide financially for the date. I thought learning about this was really interesting. It makes a lot of sense. It is so important that the definition is understood. Sometimes when it is not clear, people are left confused about relationships.
I also enjoyed talked about the know quo. In order to know someone better, there are three aspects that are important. Time is a very important factor. We discussed how it takes about three months to get to know someone. Togetherness is also very necessary. There has to be a wide range of shared activities between people. Talking is one the most significant facctors. This is all about mutual self disclosure. This is how to get to know someone better. If there is not open communication, it is very difficult to really know someone.